From our family to yours

What I learned in four years of marriage

As I've written in this post, Daddy A and I have been together for almost a decade (more than 5 years being BF/GF and 4 years of being hubby and wifey). But having a BF/GF relationship is so much different from being married. It's really different when you share one bed, one banyo, one toothbrush (hehe joke). Most specially once you have kids, and problems that are far more complicated than san tayo kakain or what movie we will watch. That's why getting married is not for the faint-hearted, those self-centered, and those who easily give up. You really have to be ready. Ika nga "hindi parang kaning isusubo na pwedeng iluwa kapag napaso" (not like cooked rice that you can spit out when it burns your mouth - ayos ba translation ko?).

It's not about looking for someone perfect, neither is it about settling for less. You just have to find that one person whom you can't imagine life without.

Just read this timely quote from a friend's FB post:

"He's not perfect. You aren't either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn't going to quote poetry, he's not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don't hurt him, don't change him, and don't expect more than he can give. Don't analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he's not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don't exist, but there's only one guy that is perfect for you."  - Bob Marley

Hope whoever reads this may find or has found the perfect one for you as well. Love, love, love =)

Another year down this crazy, exciting, wonderful road of marriage. Here's to forever dubs!

Post backlogs

It's December already and I have a plethora (yes big word hehe) of posts in my draft folder and lots of pictures in my tablet that I haven't documented yet. My backlog has piled up since the last week of October!

Hay, anyway, to make up for it...here's my best attempt to tackle them one by one. I don't like to do naman a round-up like I did for April to June. More pictures, more kwentos, more posts the better.

So just to summarize my list and tick them of one by one (bullet day I will finish you all):
JD's 4th month check up/Galleria day
Pico de Loro getaway
Undas 2013
Parent-teacher meeting
Weekend roundup - November 9-10
JD's 5th month
Christmas shopping at Trinoma and The Spa experience
Alice in Wonderland party
R's first stint as a flower girl
KKK, Mickey and friends Christmas at Megamall
Christmas shopping continued at SM North
Tagaytay short trip
Hulihin si Hello Kitty sa Megamall

Homaygad, meron pa pala to sa draft folder ko:
Travel posts (Days 3-5 of Daddy A's Korea trip)
Our HK trip
(well mostly all our trips)
Travel tips and essentials
R's first and 2nd birthdays - should've been in September pa

And for December:
Our Wedding - planning and all the chorva (since it's our anniversary month)
What I learned in four years of marriage

Hay talaga, gotta finish them all. Good luck to me.

DIY Christmas e-cards and gift tags

It's that time of the year again and I'm thinking of what our Christmas e-card concept will be this year.
What's more exciting is we are now four! It's also a great way of showing relatives and friends all over the world how our family and the kids have grown.

Just so you'll know we do a self-timer, a.k.a "sariling sikap" family photo and I just do the editing for our Christmas e-cards and labels. Laking tipid diba?

For the past years here are the e-cards I came up with:

In 2010 we had two versions, the Belen/Nativity:

and a bright red Christmas

In 2011, winter wonderland lang ang peg:

Last year, balls galore:

Hope none of them ends up in http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/ hehe!

I also did our personalized gift tags:

2010

2011

2012

This year, here's my draft:

Pero who knows, it may change, depending on our family photo shoot this year. I'm browsing through various concepts in the net for this year's e-card, here are some cool ones:
http://www.harvardhomemaker.com/100-photos-to-inspire-your-holiday-cards/.
Don't worry, we're steering away from these:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/hgrant/26-of-the-best-of-the-worst-family-holiday-cards

How about you guys, any ideas?

A cut-down Christmas shopping guide so you can help disaster victims

As I've written in my previous post here, one way to truly help the victims of typhoon Yolanda is to cut back on your Christmas shopping this year and instead use the money for helping out. Some may say, no to shopping entirely and I salute you for that. But for a mom like me, I guess it's quite understandable if we still celebrate Christmas on a budget even if it's just for the kids, specially since we just lost a loved one this year.

For my family's part, we've donated part of our Christmas bonuses/salaries to the typhoon victims. We also shopped for some groceries and gave out some of the kids' used clothes and toys to R's school drive for the disaster victims as well.

With our remaining Christmas budget, I'm sure our relatives and friends will understand the simple gifts we came up with this year. So how is it for us this year, you may ask? Sharing with you our scaled down gift guide:

For friends and relatives with families - Just think to yourselves, what items are really useful to you? What home stuff do you usually have to buy for your own? Instead of giving the usual wine, fruitcake, or decorative glasswares, which practically become recycled gifts anyway, give usable items. Just to give you an idea, checkout Saizen (the Japanese store) and the Home sections of SM or Landmark. They have affordable home organization or storage solution items as well as other items we use for laundry, cleaning and in the kitchen or bedroom.

Can you spot the kulit bulilit?

For teens - I know this generation is quite difficult to gift, for one, they are generally interested in gadgets (way above our budgets I know). So how about a little something for their gimmicks (the wholesome kind)? Try gifting them with movie cards:

Image from filgifts.com

Or cologne for their everyday use in school:

Image from Bench

For kids - With having two kids, I learned that you don't need to give them expensive toys. Even if you just give them something cheap, kids appreciate them as long as it's safe, colorful, and it's something they can work their hands on and freely imagine with. I think they're hyped more with the idea that they have a gift or a little surprise. Besides, they get to destroy it in just a few minutes only hehe. Kaya it's not practical to give them expensive toys (specially toddlers).

I chanced upon Toys R Us' great sale in Trinoma Activity Center this weekend and scored some great deals. And even if they're not on sale, they have reasonably priced toys for children of all ages, checkout their website: http://www.toysrus.com.ph/ Images below taken from there.

Here are their affordable educational/creative toys:

Toys for girls:

 For boys naman:

In Saizen there are these cute kiddie folding chairs for Php88 each only. We got some also, for when we go out and you suddenly need a place to sit (lalo na si Daddy A habang inaantay ako during shopping). Yup, they're quite sturdy.

For babies - These cuties are the easiest to give, I think. Well because they can't complain haha. But they're so exciting to shop for, with all the cute tiny clothes out there. Oops back to scaling down before I get carried away. Every parent knows how pambahays are important since our babies are home most of the time, though it's something not usually gifted. At your local department store, you can buy sandos/tees and shorts in sets of threes. Just get a bigger size if you're not sure of the baby's size. Bibs, towels and wash cloths are also quite useful. Be careful in giving skin care products though like bath soap/wash, powder, cologne etc. since you may not be sure of the preferred brand of the parents and babies' skin are very delicate.

Image from SM Baby Company

For office mates - Ever since I have been gifting my office/group mates a personalized calendar. It has become tradition I might say, and happily they anticipate it naman. I basically edit a printable calendar off the internet and insert birthdays of my officemates (para alam kung sino manlilibre ng lunch) and the holidays we look forward to (walang pasok! yehey). Then for the cover picture, I do a collage of all our faces. Pwede rin siyang pang Eeny, Meeny, Mini, Mo, sinong susunod na magreresign dito! Hehe joke lang.

For classmates of your children - National bookstore has plenty of activity books, notepads, stencil and stamp sets that are below Php100. Check out Saizen/Daiso's Sanrio rack as well:

For the women in your life (mom, sister, best friends, etc., even your children's teacher) - How about charm bracelets? I'm not talking about the Pandora levels. There are great and affordable accessories at SM or Landmark to choose from. Also check out bag/accessories organizers at Saizen/Daiso.

For the men in your life (dad, brother, friend etc.) - Socks and undershirts are great gifts as well since they are regularly used but rarely replaced. Belt/tie holders are also useful gifts.

For your ninongs/ninangs/titos and titas - Last year at SM Homeworld, during on of their sales, I was able to score Wamsutta 300-500 count Egyptian cotton pillow cases at Php175 for a set of two!

Generic/Neutral gift ideas - Everyone travels at least once a year right? Why not give Travel/packing cubes? This is one travel essential I cannot live without specially with my family of four, it's a great way to organize our luggage. Saizen/Daiso has these as well, at a much affordable price. Pero baka wala na kayo mabili dahil pinakyaw ko na lahat hehe.

Image from here

To be environment friendly you can pack your gifts in an eco/reusable bag like what I did last year (one per family). It saves you time wrapping gifts as well.

Again let's all remember it isn't about the monetary worth of the gifts we give, but the message that comes with it, "you are being remembered in this season of giving and sharing". Like they always say, "it is better to give than to receive." Also the most important thing is that you get to enjoy the holidays with your family. Nothing beats that.

As we celebrate the season, let's not forget our countrymen in the Visayas. Let's say a prayer for them as well.

How to really help disaster victims

Last night as I came home from work, the news was on TV. My three-year old daughter approached me with a sad and questioning look in her eyes. "Mommy, wawa ung small bata, wala na bahay". I told her, "be thankful to God we have a home and we are safe." It's so hard to explain to a toddler why tragedy strikes, but I guess it is easier to explain why we need to help.

As I write this post, the death toll over the recent super typhoon "Yolanda" (international name "Haiyan") is nearing 1,800. Also, social media has already been flooded with posts whether it be sympathy for victims, gratitude for being spared, guilt for not being in the scene to help out, or showing ways to actually help out. This entry may be just an addition to the barrage of posts/tweets I have mentioned. But if this contributes in some little way to alleviate the sufferings of my countrymen, it's worth a shot.

In my own humble opinion, here are just some ways on how to truly help:

1. Pray as a family. No amount of relief effort or nobody could give better comfort to someone who has lost almost everything than God Himself. Let's pray for healing and comfort for these people affected by the recent disasters.
2. Don't let the guilt of not being able to directly help affect you. Instead be a productive member of society (whether you are a student, a mom, or part of the corporate work force) by offering our work and sacrifices for the victims. Patty Laurel puts it better in this post.
3. For donations in kind, give those that will really be put to good use. We all mean well, but take a step back and think before piling up boxes of old shoes, clothes, basically your old stuff. Will they be able to use those stilettos, gowns, costumes, etc.? Also with regard to formula or powdered milk, just think, they have no access yet to clean water and sanitation in their area, it might just do more harm than good. For breastmilk, they should be passed through the proper channels. Let the volunteers help the women lactate for their babies. For more information, please see related posts here: http://www.chroniclesofanursingmom.com/2013/08/compilation-of-emergency-posts-again-no.html and here: http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/foreigners/2013/11/how_to_help_typhoon_haiyan_survivors_in_the_philippines_the_only_donation.html  
4. For monetary donations, just make sure they go to reputable agencies which will directly channel them to relief operations. Please check http://www.wheninmanila.com/verified-legit-ways-to-help-super-typhoon-haiyan-yolanda-victims-how-to-donate-or-volunteer-with-legitimate-organizations/, which has quite a comprehensive list.
5. Cut down on your Christmas shopping/party funds and instead use these to help, like this nice petition at change.org http://www.change.org/ph/mga-petisyon/all-filipinos-and-those-who-love-filipinos-scale-down-shopping-this-christmas-give-each-other-hand-made-gifts-and-gifts-of-deeds-let-s-channel-our-gifts-to-victims-of-typhoon-yolanda-and-the-recent-earthquake
6. Avoid doing any of these apathetic moves: http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-news/15926503-after-haiyan-10-things-filipinos-shouldnt-do-on-social-networks

Lastly, lighten up and be grateful for the roof over your heads, the dry clothes on you and the warm embrace of your family. If you feel heavily burdened right now, just put yourselves in the shoes of our countrymen who have lost almost everything, and you'll realize just how truly lucky you are.

Birthday realizations

This shows I really had a busy birthday. I was supposed to publish this draft in October but never had the time.

Basically, I just want to write an inspirational and thanksgiving post. It's been another year, another blessing, another opportunity to make the most of this life that God gave me. Like I always say, I will strive to exude positivity in this blog despite the hardships and heartaches that come my way. Also, these are things I'd probably say to my seven year old, thirteen year old, and 18 year old, self.

So as my age officially leaves the calendar, here are my realizations:

1) I can bear pain – When I was young, I used to cry/cringe at injections or minor scratches/wounds. I'd also bawl out of impatience or when I can't do a task/project perfectly (may pagka OC kasi ko nung bata ako, well sometimes up to now). As I grew old and matured, my threshhold for pain pala increased (whether physical or emotional). I never imagined I would be able to endure the pain of childbirth, death of a loved one, as well as heartbreaks and heartaches. I really just had to go through it to get through it.

2) I am beautiful – I don't want this to sound like an Olay or Ponds commercial, but when I was a kid I had inferiority complex because of my dark complexion. I'd cry from teases I get from classmates, friends, (even my own brother!) like "anak ni Ben Tisoy, aeta, and negrita". Eventually I learned to love my color (inggit kaya satin ang mga fahreners), appreciate it's benefits (you're less likely to get skin cancer) and believe that beauty is truly skin deep. Borrowing a quote from my beloved sis in law, "maputi nga kili-kili, masama naman ugali" and "ang derma kaya paputiin ang maitim, pero ang masamang ugali, mahirap gamutin". Hehe!

L-R: Me during my pre-school "awkward and negneg" years, high school, college, a blushing bride four years ago, a mom at present

3) I can manage and be independent – Before, well up until now to a certain extent nalang, I am very dependent on my parents for anything (little miss helpless). Never did I imagine I would be able to manage a family/household, a full time career, and hopefully a blogging career all at the same time. Just check out my everyday sched here. I guess when you become a wife and mom, lumalabas nalang ang multi-tasking skills. But I admit, I can only do this with some help and delegation, also accepting I'm no super woman.

4) I can soar, see the world - Yes there's a whole new world out there we have to explore. Don't let poverty hinder your dreams, instead allow it to be a motivation. As I've written here, envision those dreams, pray and work hard.

5) I am smart – I've learned that excelling in academics will get you a few steps ahead initially but it’s really EQ (how you handle emotions and getting along with people from all walks of life), street smarts and hardwork that makes you soar. Use your head wisely in making big decisions since that creates the path to your future.

6) I am capable of loving and being loved - I have friends who withstood the test of time and accepted me for who I am. I have a wonderful family who will always be there to support me no matter what. I have a loving and super patient husband who puts up with me every single day. I have two adorable kids. Up to now I don't know what I did to deserve these people in my life. I must have done something right after all. Through them I learned about loving unselfishly and unconditionally. I also learned that to be capable of loving, one must love oneself first.

Lastly, I have a beautiful life. I hope this post doesn't come out as bragging. It's just that I'm not ashamed to be thankful of this life that God has given me. I have learned to appreciate its ups and downs. I also expect as much trials as there are, more blessings will come my way. God is indeed good.

Image from here

Our firm's fun-tastic Friday

Our office has this annual tradition of dressing up our work spaces for Halloween and handing out treats to the kids. This started four years ago. Basing on FB, seems most offices already do this. It's one of those Western customs we are now Filipinizing. Or just our way of saying Trick or Treat-More Fun in the Philippines.

For the first year, our department's theme was Harry Potter. I had just given birth to R that time so I was on maternity leave. For the following year we went with Super Mario Brothers. R went as Princess Peach and got her share of treats (see picture here). As mentioned in my previous post, we weren't able to go last year because of the heavy traffic. Nevertheless, my groupmates dressed up our area ala Andy's playroom in Toy Story.

This year it was all about positivity. Our group's theme this time was fun in the carnival:

Well, so did two other groups:

Other areas had a fiesta theme:

This one went with Santa's workshop in the North Pole. Quite practical since the decors could stay on 'til Christmas hihi.

Eto Ipad lang ang peg. Kume-Candy Crush lang:

Another group transported us to Legoland:

All those pics I took early in the morning when I arrived, that's why you could still see some kalat. But the areas were magical came afternoon. Everyone transformed into their characters once the kids came.

And here come my kids. Ok so much for preparing this Halloween (see previous post here). I was super busy so I went retail/RTW for their costumes. My super heroes:

R as Wonder Woman, enjoying her popcorn:

JD as Spiderman being carried by the carnival's wizard, one of my officemates:

Here they are fooling around in my cubicle:

All in all, R had fun with her loots (which I sifted through at home - limiting the sweets and retaining biscuits and stickers). 'Til next year!

Parent-teacher meeting and thoughts on parenting

This morning, Daddy A and I took a leave from work to attend to R's mid-year parent-teacher meeting. I was so excited yet nervous at the same time. A lot of things crossed my mind like, makulit kaya ung anak ko at laging napapa stand-in-the-corner? Or laging nasa noisy roster? Row four ba siya? Hehe I know OA!

Well modesty aside, Daddy A and I were very good students during our school years. Always on top ika nga, hindi rin kami na pri-principal's office. So pressured din ako, am I raising my kid well? At the same time I don't want to be too strict lest she grows up too guarded and baka magrebelde pa.

Well all my fears were put to rest when I read this:

Akalain mo yan, my daughter knows the rules and strictly adheres! Well I had an inkling though that this would be the assessment since at home she pretty much plays teacher (well ok she sounds like a mayordoma!) telling everyone to put things in their proper place (e.g. worn clothes go straight to the laundry). She also thrives in order (e.g. dapat laging may placemats pag kumakain) and sometimes OCness kicks in (e.g. magagalit yan sakin pag hindi terno ung panty at bra ko, dapat daw partner). The orderly Virgo in her shows talaga.

In terms of letter, number and shapes recognition, I have full confidence in her. Just after turning two years old, she knows all of those by heart. Nevertheless I don't want to pressure her that much in terms of academics. I'd rather focus on her emotional development. I'm also glad that their school doesn't give out awards during the preschool years which sends a good message to parents about things that really matter. Interacting with all sorts of people, playing fair, being independent and interdependent, these are the life skills that our children will need when they step out into the real world.

To be honest there really are times when she's quite a handful. She'll throw in a tantrum from time to time (well which toddler doesn't). But she's just usually whiny when sleepy or hungry. When she's unruly, a little timeout threat does the trick, that we don't result to doing timeouts at all. And I am proud to say we still don't see the need to spank.

I came across this link that lists the signs of having a spoiled child. I could say we are still on safe ground. And hopefully by the time she passes toddler stage, we have graduated from these with flying colors. I also saw how she matured when she became a big sister.

I'm not saying our parenting style is great, believe me, it's an everyday struggle. But we may have done some right things which I'll share:

• We praise when warranted, not too smothering
• When she does something bad, we explain why what she did was wrong and make her go on timeout if she refuses to say sorry or hasn't learned her lesson 
• We try to cultivate in her the love for books and reading. We'd rather give inexpensive activity books as pasalubong whenever we come home from trips and try to read to her at night.
• We prefer to give pretend play toys 
• Although we do allow her to play with the tablet, we limit its use. I actually bring it to work so she won't be able to see it. But I do acknowledge that her letter, number and shapes recognition were partly because of some great apps.
• I always ask how her day in school went and listen to them. Really listen to them and what they have to say, hindi ung "listening kuno"
• I "used" to have weekly dates with her. Aww, this is something I feel so guilty. I am not able to do this anymore since I gave birth to JD. Through this, I learn more about her personality, likewise she feels secure and knows that I'm just focused on her. I hope to bring this back, and also do this with JD.

These are just some of the things on the top of my head. Everyday is a chance to try out something new. You just have to agree with your husband how to raise your kids and you should stick with it so they don't get confused.

I could say we are so blessed to have an amiable and loving daughter. I'm so excited to see how JD turns out as well. I think with the second/next child it's a bit easier since may practice na kami with the first (well hopefully). =) 

Baby's monthly check-up, Hainanese, Bo's Coffee, Galleria

We took JD for his regular monthly check-up. He had his pneumococcal vaccine, the most expensive vaccine for babies (tumataginting ng Php5k!). As usual he only cried for a short time. We had the doctor also check his Ate R's gums because of the accident I mentioned here. She prescribed an ointment (namamayat na ung wallet ni Daddy A huhu).

Anyway, after the hospital, we went to Robinson's Galleria. We were going on an out-of-town trip the following day (see next post), and so we had to buy some stuff. First, we had lunch at Hainanese Delights. It's actually my second time here because I used to have a client in the area.

I guess Wee Nam Kee is still better, but it's not that bad because they have bigger servings. Daddy A had their breaded pork, while I had the traditional Hainanese (steamed) chicken. We also ordered ramen on the side.

Afterwards, feel ni Daddy A magcoffee pa so we went to Bo's Coffee. Syempre I had the decaf mocha. Nice din their backdrop noh?

The kids and our Alma Mater's Arch of the Centuries. #futurethomasians

Daddy and the kiddos

We then headed for what actually we came for: Watsons for sunblock and some other toiletries, Saizen for cheap beach toys (for making sand castles), and we also bought R floaters.

Daddy A wanted to go bowling pa sana, kaso sarado na pala ung Paeng's skybowl (hello high school!). We went to SM North instead. Unfortunately, all lanes were occupied, so we settled for the little arcade games boo! At least R was happy.

Watch out for our Pico de Loro trip up next!

Expired driver's license and a bruised princess

Yesterday, I took some time-off to renew my driver's license. I've been driving for a week with an expired license pala, eh may mga daredevil/barubal moves pa naman ako sa EDSA. Oops.

I headed for the nearest satellite office in Ayala MRT station. All in all, without the drug testing na, it took me 2 hours. Yep still that long. The backlog is when they get to take your picture. There's only one station kasi. Better sana if they put in two. Anyway, they're very accomodating naman and polite there.

Basically there are just four steps to renew:

1) Go to window 1, surrender your old license, fill up the form

2) Medical (weight, height, eye check up)

3) Picture taking and digital signature

4) Pay the fee (License fee - Php350 + Computer fee Php67.63 + medical Php100, if you're late in renewing, penalty fee of Php100)

Viola, you get your card right then and there.

Before heading back to the office, I grabbed a quick bite at KFC for lunch, and stopped by Uncle Sam (like The Dollar store) and bought some pasalubong for R (a tiara and a princess activity set at Php66 each). Buti pala I got these kasi I did not know R figured in an accident at home.

When I got home, she was crying and showed me her bruised chin and a tear inside her lower lip. Nasalubsob pala siya. Hay she still has no yaya kasi (her yaya left unexpectedly - I don't want to dwell on it further grrr!). JD's yaya had her hands full and couldn't keep up with R's kakulitan. What I don't like lang is she didn't call me right away when my mom had to leave afterlunch and that she was left alone to take care of the two kids. She didn't even call me when R had an accident. I could have told her how to apply first aid. Anyway, good thing I'm far from the praning/panicky mom I was before. I just cleansed R's wound with Cetaphil and applied Betadine. For her inside lower lip, I dabbed Bactidol and made her gurgle salt and water solution. Note to self: give yaya a refresher on first aid this weekend. I also have to update the emergency numbers posted on the kid's bedroom wall and put it beside the phone.

After giving R some tender loving care (TLC), I gave her the pasalubongs (I was saving these sana for some occasion or as a reward, but mom's intuition, I guess, called for this care package).

I was surprised, just after turning three years old, she could write her name legibly =). You'll also see in the pic above that she can color within the lines/shapes (walang lagpas). Proud mom moment.

God please continue to cover my children with your mantle of protection. Spare them from accidents, illnesses and any sort of harm/danger specially when I'm not near them. Amen.